The term ‘narcissist’ is thrown around a lot nowadays, especially when people are going through a break-up or seeking Divorce. Whether someone is clinically diagnosed as a narcissist or they just have narcissistic traits, it can still make the Divorce process difficult to navigate. Divorcing a narcissist can be incredibly frustrating. It likely means your ex lacks empathy or is highly manipulative. These character traits can mean that reaching an amicable agreement or resolution can be difficult.

Here are a few tips from the experts to help you prepare for what may be to come:

𝟏. 𝐁𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 lengthy 𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐞

Divorcing a narcissist or someone with narcissistic traits can make the process much more gruelling. We come across some people who are just not willing to negotiate. Unfortunately, this makes the process much more frustrating and lengthier than it needs to be. When both parties can’t come to an amicable agreement on their own, other steps must be taken to be able to reach a financial settlement.

The first thing we would usually suggest is Mediation. This is a great tool which allows an impartial third party to help a couple reach an agreement. Mediation is useless if one party is not willing to compromise. In this instance, Mediation will need to be skipped and the case will need to go to Court. Once we enter Court territory, the Divorce process can become very long and expensive. When Divorcing a narcissist, it’s important to be prepared for all of the hiccups and delays that may arise. Being prepared allows you to handle the stress and financial burden more effectively. Having a good Family Law Solicitor onside is so important when dealing with an uncooperative ex.

 

𝟐. It is crucial to take 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐬 when Divorcing a narcissist.

With the first point in mind, it may be a good idea to ensure that you have secured your housing and financial needs from the get go. What we mean by this is, if you are the one moving out, ensure you have a secure and safe place to stay. Ensure you have a separate bank account and your wages are now being paid into this account. Open a new credit card in your name, if needed. We often see narcissists trying to withhold money from their ex during Divorce.

Getting ahead of the game will benefit you hugely, remember that you have a unique understanding of your ex’s behaviours and character traits. You are likely going to be aware of how they may react to certain scenarios – while this may seem daunting, you can use this to your advantage.

3. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧

You’re probably quite aware of the rollercoaster which lies ahead, but be prepared to hear some stories about yourself. A key narcissistic trait is having an inability to connect emotionally – this unfortunately may mean that your ex makes up lies about you in an attempt to discredit your character. Be aware that this could happen, and try to emotionally disconnect from the stories and remain focused on the end goal – severing financial ties and getting Divorced.

Ensuring you have a Financial Order in place is paramount when Divorcing a narcissist. We recommend getting a Financial Order in place with every Divorce, as Divorce alone does not sever financial ties. But when you’re dealing with a narcissist, it’s even more likely that they will pop up in the future attempting to make a financial claim against you. Always speak to your Solicitor about the importance of getting a Financial Order.

Get in touch

We invite you to have a confidential chat with one of our Specialist Family Law Solicitors. Our team have the experience and skills to help you to navigate through the legal process – particularly when handing a disgruntled or narcissistic ex. Our aim is always to achieve the best outcome for our clients.

Get in touch via our online contact form or call 0161 402 0213 to arrange a convenient time to have a chat.